The God of Silence...

"He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth." (Isaiah 53:7)

Life has taught me umpteen number of lessons, or rather, God, through the very many struggles, failures, trials, sufferings and joys of life, has tried to lead me, slowly and patiently, into the reality of Him; but my problem has always been that, I have neither been good nor mature enough to learn from those lessons which life, so benevolently tried teaching me at various points of the journey.

Often times, the reality of "what could have been" dawns on me quite late, well past that window of grace, where God is waiting patiently for me; waiting for my yielding and surrendering to him, albeit with a reluctant, unwilling 'Yes'. Yes to those impossible life situations that I find myself in; Yes to the job that I do not like; Yes to the slight discomfort of missing the train; Yes to extending my arms to help a brother or sister in need; and Yes, to the failures of others which sometimes hurt big time. But hold on, hold on. Dear God, with all love and respect, I genuinely think you are being very unreasonable here. How can I say Yes to any of the above? Don't you realise that I get Hurt in those situations? Can you not see my pain, my situation?  
"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven" (Matt 5:3)


Often, in my daily struggles, the focus is upon me and me alone. My family, my problems, my career, my struggles, my gains and finally my ministry. Sadly even in my mission and ministry life, I bring in my own shortcomings and narrow mindedness to such an extend that, in reality I am not doing Gods work anymore, but I am doing what I perceive to be Gods work, in a way I dictate, and if at all God wants to have a say in it, then please wait outside until I finish Gods work. And the fact is that, He waits outside, until I am done with all of His work.

Its easy to get lost in doing Gods work. As Blessed JP2 once said to some seminarians, "Don't get too involved doing the work of the Lord, that you forget the Lord of the works". Its easy to forget why we are doing what we are doing. If only I would pause for a moment and think; if only I would be in front of the blessed Sacrament and ask the Lord for the reasons and hear Him speak..
"For I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice,
the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings" (Hos 6:6)

Why do I write all these now? Over the last few weeks and months, I have seen the catholic blogosphere of UK attacking one another with such ferocity and spite, that at times I wondered, are we really followers of Christ. But, the very next moment, I am fully aware of my own weakness and my own tendency to get carried away and if at all that happens, dear Lord, I pray that you may make me read this, so that I may fix my focus back on you and not on my feelings of hurt and resentment.

So help me God..

Mission and Charity

Last Sunday we visited the Missionaries of Charity house in Southall and spend the morning with the sisters over there. Although we had planned to arrive in time to join the sisters for the Holy Mass, as is our wont we were late in the morning and eventually reached there by about 10:15am. By that time most of the cooking was done and many of our guests had already come. We helped with the rest of the cooking, and by about 11, the sisters started off the Soup Kitchen with a short prayer, beginning with a hymn, followed by the Gospel reading for the Sunday and a short reflection on it and finally praying for our Lady's intercession. We helped with serving the lunch and once the meal finished, with the cleaning and also joined the sisters for their prayer after the Soup Kitchen.

Everything we did over there in the soup kitchen, eventually made sense to me because of what we did before that and after that in the chapel. Only in the context of the person of Christ could I see the meaning of all this. It is hard to do what the sisters are doing, day in day out. They don't take holidays, don't get appreciated for what they are doing, does the same chores day after day; washes the same dishes, mops the same floors and above all, the people they serve, more often than not, take them for granted. Yet, these same sisters made our day by the smile of their faces, the joy of their hearts and the warmth of their welcome. I read the Gospel, they, they live the Gospel. I search for Christ; and Christ lives in them.

Charity that doesn't have its root in faith, is mostly, unsustainable. Yes, we have hundreds of charities across the country doing some wonderful work. The difference is that Christian charities work with and for people who do not appreciate, most times hate, those who so selflessly serve them. "Mother Teresa left home at age 18 to join the Sisters of Loreto as a missionary. She never again saw her mother or sister"(reference wiki). All through the rest of her life, struggling as a young nun in a foreign land, taking care of the needy, the hungry, the naked, the homeless, the crippled, the blind, the lepers, the unwanted, the unloved, the uncared; she saw the face of Jesus in each and every person. And so she loved, loved every poor, injured and dying; because she was convinced she was doing what her Lord asked her to do. (John 13:34) She loved, because she knew the worth of a human being, the beauty of a human being, the dignity of a human being.

As St James rightly says, faith without work is useless. When God becomes the centre of my universe, the love of Christ emanates from the Spirit through me and Caritas becomes part of my character, just like the sisters we met. Every single day, the word is being made flesh through them, and all who have eyes to see, witness the miracle of the splendor of truth and yet I ask, what is truth...